Truly Alive
by Mistress Slytherin
Summary: Harry is the master of death, but when everyone he loves is dead and refuses to return to him what will he do?  Who will comfort him? HP/RAB


**Ok so I just felt like writing this, in fact I couldn't sleep until I got it out, it was a disturbingly beautiful thought that came to mind while I was reading something and it wouldn't let go**. **I'm not really one for necrophilia just to tell you all, but seriously this story had a life of its own, it kept nagging at me until I wrote it down. don't judge me! I'll still be posting the fifth chapter to my story survive later today..it is currently 12:18am here...so no worries about that, any way I'm heading to bed now that this story has been evicted from my brain. Let me know what you think eh?**

NOT MY CHARACHTERS

MALE/MALE RELATIONSHIP

NOT FOR THE EYES OF CHILDREN

**Mistress Slytherin**

Harry stared into the murky grayness of the stone unwilling to call upon them- all of them. The war had taken everyone he knew and loved from him and left him the master of death, a hollow victory. He could not die and he could not bring them back because they did not wish to return to him. Harry stared into the murky grayness of the stone he'd retrieved after the final battle. He'd been desperate and obsessive in his search for it wanting nothing more than to see the people he loved and yet the moment he'd found it, he'd been unable to use it terrified of losing himself like the stone's original owner had. So he'd brought it to the goblins, who were still rather annoyed with him for having broken into Gringotts yet in a sort of respectful way for having succeeded, and had a new ring made for it. Yet now, in spite of his great wealth, the glory he'd earned, and the promise of a limitless future, he could only stare at the stone and sit listlessly in Sirius' bedroom in number twelve Grimmauld place thinking of what he'd lost. He had a decision to make now; death had told him that there was one who was willing to return for him. He found it ironic that the only person willing to sacrifice their peace for him was the only one he'd never met- Regulus Black. Sensing that he'd come to a decision the shadows began to shift and the hulking shadowy figure slipped free of them hovering slightly in anticipation.

"Bring him back." Harry said looking away from the ring. He needed someone to keep him anchored lest he give in and walk into deaths waiting arms before he'd ever gotten the chance to truly live. Death, ever present tilted his head and Harry felt suddenly and inexplicably sleepy. So tired in fact that he toppled over from the seat he'd been sitting in and fell to the ground asleep before he could register that he had fallen.

"Harry…Harry Potter?" He woke slowly apathy already setting in and tilted his head up to look at the young man- the young not-quite-alive Regulus Black who was looking at him worriedly. Harry blinked at the grayed pale skin acknowledging that though Regulus had returned to the land of the living his body was in fact in a perpetual state of death. Curiously he raised his hand brushing his fingers against the cold gray lips drawing a gasp from the man.

"You can feel that?" Harry asked blinking in scholarly curiosity. Regulus frowned and looked away.

"Yes, my senses are heightened in this state my nerves- hyperaware of everything." He said tugging at the collar of his long dark robes. Harry nodded and slowly sat up.

"I'll find you softer clothing." He said absently as he rubbed his eyes. Regulus nodded and Harry was given the impression that if the man had been able to he would have blushed. "Are you hungry?" He asked after a moment tilting his head to the side as he tried to remember how long it had been since he had eaten. Regulus frowned tilting his head to the side.

"I'm dead." He said quietly as if puzzling something out. Harry couldn't help but find the befuddled expression on the man's face endearing. "I don't _need_ to eat, but I guess I could try." He said shrugging his shoulders absently and flicking a strand of loose hair behind his ear. Harry smiled at the motion before slowly standing.

"Kreacher!" He said wondering if the old elf was even alive still. There was a small crack and the house elf appeared looking at Regulus wide eyed for a moment before bursting into tears, embarrassing the two of them until at last they could calm him down and request some food. Another crack left them looking at each other apologetically for a moment before bursting into peals of laughter. Harry was stopped short at the sound, it was so foreign- he'd become used to hushed silences broken only by screams or the sounds of battle, it had been far too long since he'd heard the sound of laughter. Regulus seemed to sense this and his own laughter ceased.

"I was watching you know." He said quietly a sad look mix with admiration. "We all were, but I watched the longest, even before your parents died I was watching. I saw it all, and…you are by far the bravest soul I've ever seen." He said looking away, once again Harry found himself wondering if the man would have blushed.

"Food is being ready!" The loud crack startled them both breaking the tension that Harry could feel the anticipation as they waited- for what he was unsure, but he had a feeling it would have been something nice. He had only to make a single move; instead he made his way to the door watching in mild amusement as Regulus scolded Kreacher lightly for the house's state of disrepair, the elf wringed its hands great teardrops falling from his eyes leaving Harry with no doubt that by the next day the house would be spotless. The meal was surprisingly good and Harry spent it in companionable silence content just to have someone _there _with him until there was nothing left of their pies and they had nothing left to do but to stare at each other. For Harry it was disconcerting after having been alone for so long, to have someone gazing at him with the same equal intensity that he was offering the other man. He tilted his head to the side considering as the man finally stood and made a move, though not one he'd expected. Cold, soft lips pressed against his and he felt the difference oddly beautiful. He had never considered romance after Ginny, had never considered romance with a man at all, yet he found himself responding to the kiss meeting it touch by shy touch. Regulus was panting when he pulled away and his eyes were glazed over.

"Let me share the burden of your sorrow Harry Potter." He whispered earnestly. "Let me live here beside you- the man I've come to respect and love." He said. He opened his mouth to say more but Harry placed his fingers against the soft lips silencing him as something like longing rose up nearly overwhelming him.

"If you'll have me-" Lips cut him off no longer shy but devouring and demanding as hands nervously skirted over the buttons on his robe unsure despite his bout of confidence. Harry was nearly lost to the kiss when it finally lessoned and sweetened before becoming the merest brush of lips a tender reassuring caress as if the man couldn't truly part with him.

"I'll have all of you Harry Potter." Regulus said quietly his voice trembling with need. "Everything that you offer I will take with gratitude." He swore his fingers anchoring themselves in the rough folds of his robes. Harry was startled by the intensity of it all and couldn't help the soft moan that fell from his lips.

"Take it then." He whispered needy. "Take it all just please-! Never leave me!" He begged. Hands were gentling him then as he shook guiding him coaxing him to stand and then to make his way back up the stairs to what he realized was Regulus' old bedroom. Words suddenly became useless to them. An odd sort of urgency and painstaking patience warred within them as slowly they divested themselves of clothing stopping frequently just to reach out and touch some unveiled bit of skin assuring both themselves and each other that they were real, that they were there. At last they were rolling on the bed a mesh of cool flesh and heated flesh, a tangle of tanned skin and grayed skin as their eyes and lips met the kiss fiery despite the contrast in bodily temperature. Regules let out a low keening sound as Harry bit into his collar bone. Harry watched entranced as the dark head of hair was tossed back in ecstasy until heated needy eyes met his.

"Oh Harry do you have any idea just how wonderful you are?" The man whispered reverently and Harry, who _did_ have the capability to blush did so sheepishly as cool gracefully tapered fingers slid across the seam of his lips and _pushed_. Harry, who had only the slightest knowledge of what was about to occur obliged offering the tips of the fingers a hesitant swipe of his tongue then watching enraptured as gray eyes rolled back a heady moan rumbling from the man's chest to his mouth vibrating pleasantly against the pads of his fingers. Encouraged and entirely aroused he lapped at the digits eagerly nipping at the tips gently in retaliation to the clever fingers that had begun to tweak one of his rather sensitive nipples playfully. The fingers moved then and gray eyes met his intently as they slipped down between his legs one slipping into the guarded entrance without preamble. Harry let out a gasp and tilted his head back at the unexpected feeling. Slowly the finger began to pump inside of him and he shuddered at the new and rather pleasant feeling.

"More." He gasped when desire made its needs known to him. He wanted more, wanted the sensation to increase, to burn, to fill him up- to fill that hollow spot that he'd come accustomed to. Regulus let out a low groan at the whispered plea and answered it in the form of another slender finger sliding in further, deeper just the way he needed and wanted it causing him to arch off the bed with a short cry.

"Alright?" Regulus managed between pants and Harry could only give him a shaky nod as the fingers delved deeper brushing something inside of him that made him scream. Regulus' eyes widened his pupils dilated in lust as he watched as if spell bound by the expressions crossing Harry's face. Harry reached out gripping the man's arm desperately his eyes relaying the need that simply wouldn't pass his already opened and ready lips. Regulus growled and yanked his fingers out drawing a short gasp from Harry. Before the loss could be truly recognized Harry was being gifted with his silent demand as he was nearly torn apart at the seams screaming and following it by a groan as the feeling of being filled combined sweetly with the pain making it somehow more real to him as he lay gazing blankly up at Regulus tremors slowly sliding up and down his spine and arms and legs until his need returned him to a semi-conscious state of mind.

"_Move_!" He begged helplessly watching as lust clouded over gray eyes and with the same suddenness as the man had taken him he was pulling back and thrusting again and then again the hardness brushing against that spot from time to time forcing fireworks to light behind his eyes as coherent thought became impossible and the sheer beauty of being lost to this overwhelmed him sending him higher and Higher still until he swore he could take no more- and then gray eyes met his in blissful understanding and he was soaring high in the air riding on the smooth exhilarating wind until steadily and surely it carried him down leaving him with a gentle, fond caress. He laid there for some time panting next to Regulus his mind spinning in endless wonder as a slow smile crossed his lips. Suddenly he could see worth in the future. He could see the two of them living out their endless years peacefully, seeking out their every desire until the two of them had fulfilled every requirement they might have had in life, until they were ready to rest in their graves contentedly. They would leave no wish unfulfilled no desire unsought, they would live life to the fullest with each step they took. Slowly he turned to the side where Regulus was watching him the look in his eyes telling him that he was having the same thoughts. They were alive, he realized for the first time. They had no limits. A slow smile crossed his lips as he leaned into the loose circle of arms content for the first time in his life.


End file.
